Shot on location at 814 Grove St. courtesy of Mike Finn

Director of Photography Dominick Hildebrand

Production Assistants Noel Talens, Allie Stevens & Duane Quintana

THE REAL STEEL BUTTERFLY

Madamme Aida: Tita Aida if You’re Nasty

■ PAOI EULALIA

MXD celebrates the legacy of Bay Area’s reigning queen of social work and LGBTQ freedoms. Always graceful yet courageous in the frontlines of our community’s civic battles, SF Community Health Center Director Tita Aida (aka Nikki Calma) has proven to be one of our generation’s pioneer in the POC and Trans Revolution.

People forget that you’re the original queen of San Francisco media. LOL! We gotta school these kids on how it’s done. But kidding aside, how’re you and what’s cooking for 2019? A year ago, I just turned half a century old and suddenly there’s so much to think about. Where did the 50 years go? What have I accomplished? I started paying more attention now when I receive mail from AARP. I also have been thinking about retirement. I am fortunate to have such strong support systems around my identity as a trans woman, at the field I decided to work in, which is the non-profit sector and HIV/AIDS, plus I have a chosen family that acts as a surrogate for my real family who is back in the Philippines.

 What was your transition like? OMG! You want me to go back to dinosaur times? I really can’t remember when I took my first estrogen pill or shot. What I do remember is the availability of what many are benefiting from right now such as access to hormone replacement therapy (HRT), primary medical care, access to economic empowerment, and seeing more trans people in media. These were non-existent when I decided to live my authentic self. There was a void on trans role models. Most of the stories I heard were all about white trans folks which was difficult for me to relate to. I was fortunate to find support amongst trans people, particularly of color, who I met when I wandered out in the streets trying to survive. I sought support in every way I can, mostly from friends. There were only a handful of support groups for trans people and most of the people who attended didn’t look like me and had different issues than mine. But I survived.

 What’s the biggest advice you can give to a young trans person today? In the course of my transition, I always respected people and gave recognition when it is necessary. When I did this to others, they gave kindness back. As a young person, it is important to surround yourself with positivity and love. I escaped negativity by thinking that there will always be a better day the next day. Self-affirmation of your worth and loving yourself is important.

Are you dating? I am not dating as of the moment. I lost my partner for quite some time now and it’s hard to just pick myself up and start meeting people. I’m very old school when it comes to dating. If it comes around, great! If it doesn’t, then I keep myself preoccupied like visiting, calling, or checking on my family.

Conflict always happens but that doesn’t mean it cannot be resolved or discussed. When a wrong is being done, stand up and correct it. Even if it’s not to you, do it anyway.

 What’s your chosen family like? My SF Community Health Center family who accepted me unconditionally and helped me tremendously to become who I am now. My AsiaSF family who nurtured me and provided an outlet to express my creativity and interest in performing. My friends who have always been there through thick and thin. I cannot express enough that support is so important.

What message do you have for our readers about The POC Revolution? What is your role in achieving racial equality? Conflict always happens but that doesn’t mean it cannot be resolved or discussed. When a wrong is being done, stand up and correct it. Even if it’s not to you, do it anyway, because you want them to do that for you, too. Let love rule your heart. I am considered by many, a person of color, but I am aware of my Asian heritage and that sometimes, I have more privileges than other ethnicities. For me, equality means equality. I try to be a voice for those who do not have voices. I defend those who are oppressed and I try to do the right thing to make sure that it doesn’t happen to others. Knowing that POCs are 10 times likely to be discriminated than white people, that they are targeted for violence and abuse, prompts me to make sure that I give my time and energy to support their fight and do what I can do while I’m able to.